I must have honed in on some type of self-discovery current that is zinging through the Bay Area.
Just this morning at a mothers group that I attend, the speaker's topic was centered around figuring out how to be the best version of you, in order to be the best parent that you can be. Bingo.
The speaker took it a step further and said that if the best version of you means hiring a babysitter once a week so that you have time to allow yourself to think... then do that. Go for a run. Take a pottery class. The options are endless and completely a personal preference. If that means working or volunteering part-time, full-time, whatever it might be- do that. Children sense when you are unsatisfied and miserable. It's your job to exemplify what a centered person looks like and acts like.
I also figured I might as well throw in another topic while I am on this introspective rant.
Guess what else is vital to having a healthy family and child? If you are married you have to make time to connect with your spouse. I am not just talking sex either (even though most men will tell you they really don't require anything else). Why do we hear stories about empty nesters splitting after 30 years of blissful marriage? Because the children become the only thing they have in common and once the kids take off there is nothing left in the relationship. They are strangers to each other.
I do not ever wish to be sitting across from Ben, strumming my fingers on the kitchen table, wondering what I ever saw in saw in him. Pay a babysitter people. Cut the umbilical cord and dare to do fun activities with your spouse. If you are on a tight budget you can even have a date night at the gym and stick the kids in childcare. If you are nervous about finding a responsible sitter start talking to friends and relatives for recommendations. Heck, if you live in the Bay Area you can even message me if you need a few references. Maybe if you bring me copious amounts of sweet treats I might even watch your rugrat for you.
Ok. My tirade is done. I will lay this topic to rest for the time being.
The Gratitude Project Continued:
51. Compelling public speakers.
52. Tiny toilets.
53. Green apples.
54. Talented graphic designers.
55. Discovering new boots purchased months earlier in my closet.
56. A husband who laughs in his sleep.
57. Second interviews.
58. The fit of Lululemon pants.
59. Hair dye and bleach.
60. Naps in the middle of the day.
Posts
5 years ago
6 comments:
Fun to catch up on all of your posts and a giant "HEAR HEAR" to your paragraph about connecting with your spouse. SOOOOO important to have a 'life' outside of your children.
Babysitters. I've spent a butt-load of cash on them.
And never regretted it for a minute!
sarah, i am "lurking" your blog as you put it. you said you were blogging so i figured i would check it out. this is so funny...i was talking to anne-marie yesterday and she was telling me about mother's together. i was thinking,"oh sarah must have loved that talk!" good to know we are not alone in our thoughts and passionate opinions! i am currently working on having a weekly break. i used to get one and then something happened. i'm getting it back though:) okay....blah blah blah.
from one "ranter" to another.
sar, i LOVE your blog.... LOVE it. thank you for your encouraging words with humor : )
Thanks for the positive response ladies! I was worried about stepping on some toes with my last couple of posts- but figured that I would just take the plunge and ask for forgiveness later.
"If you are married you have to make time to connect with your spouse. I am not just talking sex either.."
You were so close, then you kept on writing...
-Anonymous troll
Troll,
So you think that I missed the mark after the sex point? All it takes is a steamy love life to keep a relationship sustained through the decades? Perhaps. But I think it is difficult to feel enamored by your partner when you fail to have any connection with your spouse outside of the bedroom.
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